I came to a revelation of sorts yesterday while I was home with our sick kiddo. First of all, I am not really a patient mother/wife/person when it comes to dealing with sick people, perhaps it comes from dealing with sick people all day; I have no compassion. It’s awful. I know. I try to be kind, but it is forced. The same thing happens if someone is going through a really difficult mental issue. No compassion. I try. Again, it’s forced and impatient. Last night, in talking with Hubby I realized that when it comes to my family and friends and their sickness and struggles I harden because I’m angry. I’m not angry with THEM, I’m angry with the fact that there is NOTHING I can do to “fix it”. I might be able to lessen the symptoms and make them more comfortable, however, for me…..that’s not enough, I want it fixed. Over, done and move on. It is why I am calm in the middle of a crisis (mostly), I focus on the end, the solution and what I can do to get there.
I’m not sure what I’ll do with this information. Mentally, I KNOW I can’t fix anything…and it is a work on growing my faith to do what I CAN do in loving on my friends and family during their times of sickness and struggle and to trust in Him, the Great Physician to take care of the rest. So, I suppose now that I’ve identified my issue I can pray on it and listen for direction and perhaps maybe, just maybe, be a little more compassionate when those times come.
Mark 16:18 “And these signs will accompany those who believe: in my name they will cast out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up serpents with their hands; and if they drink any deadly poison, it will not hurt them; they will lay their hands on the sick, and they will recover.”